Rant: Do Not Be A Mean Girl In Roleplaying Because That Is Not Fetch
I have a bit of a tiff with the Mean Girl mentality here on tumblr, especially towards roleplaying and fandoms in general.
A lot of the fandoms have been great to The Countess despite the fact The Countess is a historical original character, historical because she was a true historical figure; original, because I take of what I believe would fit into her and try to fill in the blanks. Thankfully, The Countess found her way around in interacting with not just vampire characters and werewolves, but with various characters throughout the fandom and original characters. I admit The Countess has difficult and I am difficult at times to find a niche with certain writers, and with other writers I seem to hit it off quickly.
I made mistakes and learned from them, but what I absolutely cannot agree with is the Mean Girl mentality when it comes to writers or whole fandoms discriminating and bashing on writers who take up canon or OC (Original Characters)characters. Not only bash on them but then go around to people who have never written before with Person A character and bias them to the writer without giving them a chance.
I admit, I did this when I first came to tumblr, but I cleaned that up because how would I feel if someone came to moi and said ‘Hey, so and so told moi you were a horrible writer or had a horrible character, but I don’t agree or I do agree only because they told me so’. That is horrible to hear that people are talking down your character because your character just might not have hit it off with your character. Instead, I thank the writer for the experience we had and I inform them if they ever make another OC or Canon to still look moi up. I even tell them we can still chat OOC, but unless the other writer severely offended or pissed me off, I have no reason to go to their friends to trash talk them.
I absolutely hate it and I could spit fire at these writers, however, I found this was a great opportunity to shed light on it.
Now, I know there are elitists within many fandoms who I admire, there are the good ones (yes, there are since a few are willing to give you lessons on the fandoms and anything of importance one should keep in mind and the inhabitants), and then there are the bad ones. Now those I wish to speak upon and thankfully, I have not come upon any who give moi lip or attitude, because I would give them lip and attitude right back for thinking they can talk down to moi.
I do not put up with the mean girl attitude, I will ask you in private if you are mature about it what is going on and how to solve the problem. I have no problem taking hours upon hours to hash it out, it sometimes ends well, sometimes end in anger, but at the end it is either resolved or we keep to our separate ways. Sometimes writers will not get along or their characters will not get along, but it does not mean you then have to make a lynch mob and gather up your posse to harass the writer into either deactivating, giving in to your ways, or driving them to tears. I know there are those lovely writers who might not have my gumption and are pressured to write a certain way to appease those writers or end up being ostracized because their character is different.
You know what that is?
If you had the tables turned on you and you were bullied, how would you feel?
Horrible. Bad. Worthless. Sad. Weepy.
Yes, that is what I thought honey, does not feel good so why would you do that to someone else who is unique in their way of writing?
In fact, I have rped with canon characters who interpret and write their characters differently than another characters. No two canon characters are the same and the same should be said about original characters. Just because I or someone else had a bad experience with a canon or an original character does not mean everyone is the same. It does not mean I am going to be mean girl, roll my eyes, and tell them they are idiots or Mary Sue’s for being here.
What good does that do? Answer: You just put someone in tears and it was not constructive criticism.
You know what you can do instead of being an asshole and making the writer feel like shit? ANSWER: Give them constructive criticism, ask them if they want help, or if you really just cannot stand the character, just unfollow.
UNFOLLOW and move on. I unfollow and move on, and have I lost sleep over it? Have I wasted my breath and my energy hating them every day? No. Have I gone to their ask box and given them shit? No, because that is high school, that is middle school mind set. This is taking a safe haven and a fun place like tumblr and turning it into the worst experience for people.
This happens in almost every fandom from the Dr. Who to the Sherlock to the Vampire Chronicles to the Supernatural to the Greek Verse to the Marvel verse, just to name a few ones that are popular off of the top of my head.
It happens to a lot of fandoms and even to group roleplays because even in group roleplays there is a pack mentality of either ‘You are with us or against us’. This is not a war, this is not a bid to see who has the best writing nor how many people to make feel insignificant because their style of writing or interpretation of a canon or an original character is different than what people would see, read, or hear about in fandoms. I never appreciated nor enjoyed the drama that came with any fandom, but the worst is observing and lurking (yes, I lurk so much, that tingling feeling you get that someone is reading your thread, that would be moi) over writers who would belittle other writers because they are not bowing down and kissing your writer behind.
Who cares if there are original rpers or canon rpers who do things their way here on tumblr? Who cares if these original characters and canon characters want to interact with characters outside of their fandom or interact with different fandoms? Who cares if they are not top notch right out the gate? Who cares if they need a little bit of help or need time to get their groove in writing? Who cares they are not perfect and awesome right out the gate?
Is that not what tumblr is all about?
To explore and to have one’s character meet with different fandoms and characters that are not canon or were originally written in movies, shows, books, plays, even historical figures?
If you have a problem with a writer, keep it between you two, and I have seen very great writers take it in private. Those are the classy writers, those are the writers who will not name names, granted they will make a broad OOC post that would warn future writers about certain things not to do to their character. However, they will politely say what is between the other writer and themselves is between them. It does not need to be taken up as a cause to bully other writers or tell them they should stop writing.
It is appalling to see how many writers are left in tears because another writer or even a band of writers huddled around to terrorize them on anon or rant about them in a passive aggressive manner.
You are not Regina and you are not a Mean Girl, unless you are getting paid or you roleplay as one of the Mean Girls, cut it out.
——Marguerite, The Countess’ writer
[[Reblog if you like, I would appreciate it considering Mean Girl mentality is not something to be tolerated when we are all here to have fun, make connections, even friends and family. Not a place to fear nor to hate to be on because of cliques or ‘mean girls’]]
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- howilovemypreciousguilt said: I agree with this so much. I’ve definitely had the mean girl issues in the Vampire Chronicles fandom. Many times I’ve left tumblr because of other VC rpers coming at me with mean girl hate, ruining rp for me. Thank you so much for this post.
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